Ishmael

In Genesis 15, after Abram pleads his case about not having an heir to call his own, God makes a covenant with Abram, promising that Abram will have his own son. I'm sure Abram and Sarai were very excited about this when he came home that night to tell her the good news. But I also noticed that in this passage, God had not given any specifics about when this was going to happen or where this heir was coming from. I suppose one would naturally assume that Abram would logically deduce that this promised heir would come from his wife, Sarai. However, I don't think that it was a natural assumption for either Abram or Sarai because Sarai was barren. So, what then would the next logical--and culturally acceptable--step for Sarai to take, as Abram's loving and supportive wife? To give Abram her servant Hagar, so that through Hagar, Abram would have his heir.

We can know, after reading a few paragraphs later, that this was not how God planned to bring about Abram's heir. But Sarai and Abram did not know that. In fact, it was like they were standing at the end of a very dark cave, where they could see, in the distance, the twinkling light of God's promise. But they couldn't even see their feet--or the ground--in front of them, so...they took a step in the dark, towards that light--it didn't deter them from their course, nor did they fall into a hole in the ground.

It's not until Genesis 17:15 that God becomes more specific about the heir he promised Abram, now called Abraham. God tells him that this son will be coming from Sarai, re-named to be known as Sarah, his 90 year-old barren wife. When Abraham heard this, he fell on his face and laughed! It seemed too impossible and ridiculous! He even asked God if He could just use Abraham's already exisiting son, Ishmael, for what God has promised. Of course God says, "No." And God also restates his promise: "...Sarah, your wife shall bear you a son, and you shall call his name, Isaac. I will establish my covenant with him as an everlasting covenant for his offspring after him." But, God does not forget about Ishmael either: "As for Ishmael, I have heard you; behold, I have blessed him and will make him fruitful and multiply him greatly. He shall father twelve princes and I will make him into a great nation." It's amazing to see that even though Ishmael was not how God intended to bring about His covenant with Abraham, God still blessed him.

Reading the story about Ishmael and Abraham reminds me that God will remain steadfast to His promise--no matter what I do. God is a good God. He is faithful. He does what is best for His people--in a sense that He plans my life in accordance to what will bring Him the MOST glory. And while Christians can know and be sure that God has promised us good things, we find ourselves in the pitch blackness of our inability to forsee every outcome of every circumstance. I'm learning more and more that actually living out my faith in who God is means taking steps in the darkness of uncertainty and trusting that God will not leave me alone in that darkness. He is there to pick me up when I fall. He guides my steps and helps me get back on track when I take a wrong turn somewhere.

Like Sarai, I often make decisions that would seem to fit into God's will for my life, only to find out that it was kind of close...but not quite Isaac. Abraham and Sarah were not punished, nor were their actions considered sinful by God. And who's to say that it was a wrong decision? I find that living, actually living life, means that there are more gray areas than there are black and whites. Living in the light of this realization means even more dependency on God's grace and His Holy Spirit. Because as God was gracious towards Abraham, Sarah, Hagar and Ishmael, He is gracious towards us in our effort to find our footing in the uncertainty. We must also be able to give grace to ourselves in that regard. I mean, if God can give room for our limits as human beings--this is seen throughout Scripture and even in how Christ came TO us, while we were sinners and enemies of God--shouldn't we also accept our limits and give our humanity some room, too?