In my young life, I've discovered that lessons learned from various seasons of life often find a converging point--a focal point, if you will. And this focal point is likened to a coat rack, and every coat that I've managed to collect over the past few months can be hung upon it. I titled this post "Un-accidental," partly because of the devotional today in Oswald Chamber's My Utmost for His Highest devotional blog and partly because I came to this focal point through a series of purposeful events. Anyway, the devotional from O.C's blog says:
The circumstances of a saint’s life are ordained of God. In the life of a saint there is no such thing as chance. God by His providence brings you into circumstances that you can’t understand at all, but the Spirit of God understands. God brings you to places, among people, and into certain conditions to accomplish a definite purpose through the intercession of the Spirit in you...I read it this morning and my mind was floored. I was drinking my homemade breakfast smoothie and my mouth dropped open, causing some of the smoothie to leak out the corner of my mouth. It was very unattractive. But I was struck with the profundity of Chamber's words and I felt that God was speaking very clearly to me. Smoothie could leak out of my nose, for all I care. In that moment, a light bulb had turned on in my brain.
It was like my life was flashing before my eyes and circumstance after circumstance were being projected onto the forefront of my mind. I am truly amazed at how God has used people, books and life events to bring me to this focal point of surrender. All the hard things that have happened were not for nothing. I knew this in my head, of course, having grown up in church, but this idea has finally dropped down the 12 inches from my head, to the very bottom of my heart.
I have been reading Surrender to Love by David Benner and the book couldn't have found its ways into my hands at a more perfect time. This is what I love about God's providence and His sovereignty. His sovereignty is not so that He can wield it to show off how powerful He is, His sovereignty is for my good, for my transformation, for my heart to grow more in love and in awe of who He is.
And I've found, that adapting this heart of surrender and being mindful of it, life seems...smoother. It definitely has its bumps in the roads and those bumps simply remind me that God's ways are better and I can trust that things will smooth out, according to His perfect will. This kind of attitude definitely causes me to have a heart constantly bowed in prayer, lest I look away from Jesus and I find myself panicking and sinking slowly into the churning abyss of anxiety, like Peter did (Matthew 14:22-33).
With all that to say, I don't mean to pat my back for all these things that I'm learning. If it were not for God's love for me causing my own love for God to grow over the years, I wouldn't be here.
We know that all things work together for good to those who love God . . . —Romans 8:28
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